Love vs Sin

I have not posted in a while not because I do not have anything to say, but I have so many thoughts going through my mind, I barely have time to think them.:)

Here is one... 

I have been going through and made aware of many trials and troubles in my life and in the lives of those I love.

I do not remember feeling this worn by emotion since I was in the depth of sin. I know a harsh contrast but go with me a minute.

When I was bound by sin I was exhausted with feelings of inadequacy, heartache, loneliness, isolation, regret, and even apathy. While the sin I was involved in made me forget for a while, I still woke up to these feelings in increasing measure. They piled on with no relief. I did not know the end at the time just the reality of sinking in every area of life.

Recently because of relationships in my life that are filled with love, feelings of inadequacy, heartache, loneliness, isolation, regret, and compassion ( which takes more emotion than apathy) flood my heart. While all of these different circumstances collide, I wake up in the Presence of my Heavenly Father, but with each passing moment of the day, the reality of each situation settles in on my heart and well pile on. If I did not love most, if not all of these emotions would not be very intense. If I did not care, we'll things would be different, but I am understanding being bound by love in a new sense. I not only weep under my own reality, but the reality of those I love as well.

Sin vs Love ... I am reminded today of the similarities, BUT I am also reminded of the differences.

Each day I wake in the comfort of my Heavenly Father. My inadequacy is strength as I yield yo Him. My heartache reminds me this is not my home. My loneliness begins the feeling and prayer of need that welcomes the Spirit of the Living God into my heart with gates open wide(doors would be an understatement for my need). My isolation compels me to proclaim the reconciliation that we can have in Christ Jesus. My regret has ebbed and now flows with the continual debt of love that I have to those around me. Finally, my compassion is not mine, but the reality that the God of all creation is still at work in me and through me. 

Not to mention the end of these two roads. Sin leads to death (Romans 6:23), but Love leads to dying(John 15).( I warned you my mind is continuous these days.) I am thinking a lot on this, but for now suffice it to say. Sin death is final separation...BUT Love dying is yielding your life to and for the One who holds true life everlasting in His Faithful Hands.

James 3:18

Camelot