Over the last few days, I have spent time at the Greenville Memorial Hospital in SC with my dad who is recovering from his second aortic valve replacement surgery. While I am sad to have to leave a while to take care of things at home in VA, I know that he is getting the best of care not only with some of the best doctors and nurses, but also by the rest of the family. In fact below is a note that my brother wrote right before the last open heart surgery...
Later today, November 29, 2006, at around 9am... My Father's heart...
which has been beating since 1949, will be stopped. This will be done
to replace his Aortic Valve which has become useless to him.
Despite
what good it will bring... it is the scariest thing I have faced in my
lifetime. The heart which taught me right from wrong, showed me love
and discipline, gave me wisdom and advice... will cease to beat, albeit
for a short time. Though a machine will do for him what his heart
normally does... nothing can prepare you for the emptiness that comes
with the knowledge that the organ that sustains life will be altered...
and paused.
Nothing can prepare you for sitting and waiting while
complete strangers cut into your Father, stop his heart and work on him
all while you sit idle hoping you have trusted him to the right people.
These thoughts and fears would go unanswered, and ultimately lead
to hopelessness if not for our Lord Jesus, who controls all things.
Through Him, we are prepared for our most desperate hour. We are
prepared for when the heart is stopped, for He holds the keys; He made
the first heart from dust. He is the one who started my Father's heart
while he was still in the womb. We are prepared because if all fails
and our greatest fears are realized... He will be there with peace and
love and the knowledge that He is still in control.
We have fear, but
not panic... Pain, but not sorrow... we are anxious, but we wait for
the good news that we know is coming. We prepare ourselves to be aids
in the long recovery... and above all we wait with open arms and our own
hearts.. full of love... the love my father has always shown us... the
love you depend on.. the love you hope you never have to live without...
The love of a Father, a husband..a family. With my arm around my
mother and my sister, and the love of my fiance beside me... we face our
darkest day tomorrow.. but the sun will soon rise.. and our father,
husband and friend.. will be right there... with a smile.
Dad, I love you.
This note not only moved me then, but I am more moved this time around if that is possible. I did not grow up in the house with my dad and step-mom, so while I was " taught right from wrong, shown love
and discipline, and given wisdom and advice" It was mostly in another household too. Which in some ways made me doubly blessed. But what occurred to me is that I am extremely blessed to have a brother who is able to tell me a fuller story of who my father is.
We all have spent time away from our Heavenly Father but "but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." Proverbs 18:24 In our lives there are times when we may feel distant from God, whether because of struggles or hurt or sin, we feel separated. But we have a friend, a Savior, a Brother who has been with God from before the beginning. We have the Spirit of Jesus to teach us all about the Father and draw us closer by His grace. While I am not saying my brother is just like Jesus, he looks a lot like Him to me.
James 4:14,
Camelot
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